Shame

Is there something you've done or has something been done to you that you feel very ashamed of? Many people carry around shame and guilt. Some have tried to escape from it by self -medicating and found that they only made it worse.

Shame is an inner sickness or a disease of the soul and it expresses itself through inner torment.
Webster's dictionary defines shame as; "A painful feeling of having lost the respect of others because of improper behavior. Shame can also make you feel different, inadequate or unworthy.

If shame is not dealt with, it will take root within you and it will begin to alter your potential and your destiny because it will ultimately paralyze you. It will tell you that you are not worthy to grow as person, you are not valuable enough to be loved or respected, and you are not good enough to be forgiven.

Shame is powerful enough to disconnect you from the people you love and from God. It will cause you to isolate and in most cases isolation breeds self destruction.

If you are suffering from shame and guilt and you recognize that it is holding you back from living the life you truly desire and it's keeping you from having the relationships you long for, it's time you rise up against it. Once and for all silence the voice of shame that tells you that you are broken and worthless.

Through counseling you can heal from the past. Whether you are suffering from consequences that you brought on by your own mistakes or you have been a victim you are worthy to be free from this pain. You are worthy to be loved and respected. You are worthy to live the life that you desire.

Don't wait another day.

Isaiah 54:4 "Do not be afraid; you will not suffer shame. Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated. You will forget the shame of your youth ..."

Miracle on Milton Ave.

It does not make news when a couple gets divorced unless they are famous. Divorces of common people are not newsworthy because divorces and the break - up of American families has become a widespread epidemic that our society has accepted.

Sadly, the current divorce rate is as follows; For first marriage, vs. second or third marriage 50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second and 74% of third marriages end in divorce, according to Jennifer Baker of the Forest Institute of Professional Psychology in Springfield, Missouri.

In January I had the honor and privilege of attending the wedding of two very dear friends. I was actually in their first wedding back in the 80's and it was so beautiful. They were young and in love and faced their future with excitement and anticipation. Together they had 4 beautiful daughters and they were living the dream for several years. But like most couples they were confronted with some unexpected storms. Unfortunately, these storms took a severe toll on their marriage and ultimately destroyed it.

Their divorce not only devastated them, but it devastated their 4 daughters, the extended family and the multitude of friends they shared. Everyone they were connected to was ultimately affected by their divorce. The impact of divorce is so great and most couples underestimate the long-term damage it will cause. It's like a ripple effect that never ends.

This family was now divided and some of their friends never came around again because they didn't want to choose sides or get in the middle. Both he and she needed a lot of love and support and the opportunity to rebuild, but it was a long, long road. Together they were amazing, but apart their every step was an uphill journey.

Although time was slowly passing, their divorce continued to weigh heavy on them. Years after the divorce there was still so much hurt and pain lying beneath the surface. It was almost impossible for them to move forward. Neither one ever remarried, nor did they find someone new to love. They had options, but no one quite fit.

Then one afternoon I visited her, and on this afternoon something was definitely different. She had a little sparkle in her eyes and a smile that was as real as they come. I anxiously waited to hear all about what was going on in her life. As she began to share, I went into shock. To my surprise, God was orchestrating something remarkable and miraculous. God was mending the relationship between her and her ex-husband. It was quite moving to hear her speak of him so tenderly. Especially after all they had been through.

I must add God did not waste any time. He not only mended their relationship, but He renewed the love that He had bestowed on them over 20 years ago. This ex-husband began to court his ex-wife all over again and he eventually asked for her hand in marriage. A brand new ring and all.

That is when it happened; I witnessed a Miracle on Milton Ave. in the city of Whittier, Ca. in January 2010. There they were, at the altar, putting everything behind them and renewing their vows. The minister said to them, "What God has joined together, let no man put asunder." And all I could think to myself was, "God is not kidding."

This couple was a Christian couple. They were actually Pastors with a thriving ministry before they divorced. The storms they faced were brutal and it cost them everything. There were many lessons to be learned. Now because of God's mercy, grace and healing power, they have both been restored, not only in marriage, but also in their hearts, souls and minds. They have forgiven one another and have allowed God to heal them and set them free from their past and all of its pain, and that is the only reason why they can move forward. Their remarriage has inspired and touched many. Especially those who knew them well.

This does not happen everyday. Broken marriages don’t just mend themselves. But it could happen more often if more of us would surrender ourselves, our mistakes and our set backs to the Lord and allow Him to deliver us, cleanse us and restore us. You see our mistakes; our broken relationships and our setbacks do not have to define us. God can turn our lives around and use our mess to become our message of hope to others.

Miracles still happen. I saw one with my very own eyes.

Choices

Once you make up your mind to serve God and fight the good fight you are presented with many decisions that will test your love and obedience for God. To live a life of wholeness in the Lord you will want to evaluate everything in your life and make the necessary changes as soon as possible. This includes the music you listen to, the people you surround yourself with, what material you read and watch. Most importantly you will want to examine where and how you spend your money and time. Where your money and time are spent will determine where your heart is.

It will not be easy to glorify God day in and day out and rest assured your mind will become a battlefield. But if you are determined to have a breakthrough in your life and you want to be free from the past then you will want to wake up and pray each morning and ask God to renew your strength. You will want to read scripture daily to feed your spirit and mind.

Practicing these Godly habits of daily prayer and reading His Word will become more and more natural to you. Eventually you will establish an inner strength that will enable you to easily make the adjustments and any necessary changes in your life. And the great part is you will no longer want to compromise your relationship with God.

1 Kings 2:3 "Observe what the Lord your God requires: Walk in His ways, and keep His decrees and commands, His laws and requirements, as written in the Law of Moses, so that you may prosper in all you do and wherever you go."

Matthew 6:21 "For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

1 Corinthians 15:33 "Do not be mislead: Bad company corrupts good character."

Like a Boxer

Like a boxer in the last round with only a few minutes left, beaten to the ground, completely exhausted and unable to see I laid there spiritually defeated. The blows finally stopped and the countdown began and the crowd roared in favor of my opponent. Face down in shame I thought, "Is it really going to end this way. Is this my destiny? Is this what it was all for?"

But then I began to hear a soft voice whisper, "Get up. C'mon, get up. You can do it. I know you can do it. Get up. In the name of Jesus get up and fight back." The voice grew stronger saying, "Get up and fight. Fight for your children, fight for all that you've lost - all that's wrongfully been taken from you! Get up and fight like you've never fought before!"

Suddenly I felt a stirring in my spirit and a strengthening in my legs and I slowly began to rise. But when I rose there was a fiery in me that ignited from all that I had been through. A fiery that said, “Enough is enough!!!” It's time to call upon my glorious Maker. It's time to look my enemy in the eye and say, "In the name of Jesus get your hands off me, get your hands off my children, get your hands off my prosperity and get your hands off of my destiny!"

Ephesians 6:12 "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against spiritual forces of evil in the Heavenly realms."

Still No Harvest

When you apply yourself each day and you work hard at what you do, yet you never reap the blessings of your labor - it can be very discouraging. Like a Farmer who has cultivated the ground with his own hands and sweat and has planted each seed so precisely and has watered and nurtured the land faithfully only to be left with no harvest year after year. It is devastating.

When you see others who are equipped with fewer tools than you, yet they are experiencing much more success it makes you question and second guess yourself. It also causes fear and anxiety about the future and your sense of security. I have been there and it is a vicious cycle that is extremely draining on the mind and spirit. I felt fragile with nothing left to give. Not one ounce more. I wanted to just give up the fight. But deep down in my soul I knew that was not the answer. I knew that if I could just get the strength to get back on the right track - all things would come together. But gaining the strength to do so was a tremendous endeavor in itself but well worth the journey.

Philippians 4:14 "I can do everything though Him who gives me strength."

Galatians 6:9 "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we DO NOT give up."

John 15 :5 "I am the Vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing."

Something Artificial

There was a time when I was living but I was no where close to being alive. Each morning I would awake only to feel an aching in the pit of my stomach that yearned for the day to come to an end. I felt I had lost all purpose and without purpose there is no reason to wake up. I believed the best years were behind me never to return. I was convinced that whatever life was left in me it would be lived in despair - without hope, without dreams, without love. How does someone who was once very alive, intelligent and vibrant come to a place like this? It's very simple. I took my eyes off of what was real and foolishly fixed them on something artificial.

John 10:10 "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destory; I have come that they may have life and have it more abundantly."